The Book Endz Cafe
Men's Health-The Bottom Line!
The Dress Code: during black tie events, women should enlist a floor length gown in a dark hue. Cocktail attire should entail an above the knee ensemble with a flashy cocktail ring.
Business Casual should include the professional look, but not too corporate; carry a structured tote. The Garden Party demands the A-line, tea length dress in a lightweight cotton; wear wedges to avoid sinking into the grass, finish with pearls/gold studs--the black dress--tone it up or down with a few key accessories.
Modern Manners: put away those cell phones, please! At your next gathering, consider setting up your voice mail or virtual assistant to manage calls; it encourages one to focus on those around you. When is it unacceptable to pull out the cell phone?
(Southern Living/March 2013).
Infertility is the inability to produce, where fear of failure and fear of success exists simultaneously (at times). We all can lose the ability to perceive circumstances correctly, being blind sighted and unaware that our understanding has its own set of eyes (insight); vision and perception can be blind and groping in the dark. The sight of someone else's prosperity can become your agony if you let it. We can be naturally alive, yet spiritually dead. When we are "saved," we are made "alive", delivered from death, which is separation from God, not just the end of life as we know it.
We are blessed with what we have left, not what we lost. Be careful what you ask and pray for because a blessing (empowerment to prosper) can drive you over the edge if you're given more than you can handle. Be patient with the process and keep walking with God (for those of you who are): "the steps of a good man (woman) are ordered by the Lord..."
Idle talk or rumors, especially about the personal and private affairs of others, aka, dishing/tattling. It has been researched in terms of evolutionary psychology and an important means by which people monitor others behavior aside from focusing on their own issues. It maintains widespread direct/indirect reciprocity and spreads in an instant like the plague. It is generally termed as the spread of dirt and widespread ignorance and misinformation. The Norm of Reciprocity-the expectation that people will respond favorably to each other by returning benefit for benefit; if they are talking about others, they are also talking about you, usually within the same breath!🐍🐍🐍
Sigmund Freud's "Beyond The Pleasure Principle," first published in Germany in 1920 is an essay marking a major turning point in his theoretical approach. Previously, Freud attributed most human behavior to the sexual instinct (eros or libido). With this essay, he went "beyond" the simple pleasure principle, developing his theory of "drives" with the addition of "death drives"-Thanatos (thanatos was a daemon personification of death, he was a minor figure in Greek mythology, often referred to, but rarely appeared in person).
The essay describes humans as struggling between two opposing drives, Eros, which produces creativity, harmony, sexual connection, reproduction, and self-preservation; Thanatos, which brings destruction, repetition, aggression, compulsion, and self-destruction.
Emotional and Mental Illness:
The distortion of human emotions and actions, the borderline between what is distorted and what is normal is not fixed by science; it varies from society to society, rapidly changing constantly. Overtly disturbed behavior is easy to recognize, but psychological disorders (of lesser degrees of severity) were accepted as normal. The mentally ill person, as victims of a broad range of psychological disorders, are usually unable to end the trouble by a mere act of will or the decision to "do right." Many are frightened and angered that their failures or dissatisfactions may be the products of an emotional illness.
There are no generally accepted definitions the professional can offer to guide the layperson as to the precise meanings of "normal" or "abnormal," "emotionally healthy," or "emotionally Ill." When Freud was asked what a normal person should be able to do, he replied:"he should be able to love and work."
Normal: the normal person "should" be able to play, see people/things around him/her without distortion, to live freely from pain, and to obtain and maintain a good deal of satisfaction from life.
Abnormal: the emotionally and mentally ill person may:
(Emotional and Mental Illness, Better Homes & Gardens/Family Medical Guide, edited by Donald G. Cooley (1973); Wikipedia (Freud & Thanatos).
the safety net
Safety behaviors are things we do to protect ourselves from harm or threat. It decreases confidence in the long run because it leaves you with the message that you need protection and would be unsafe without it. Using safety behaviors has an effect that it succeeded in preventing the threat being realized. A lot of the disasters we fear are more imagined than real.
No experiments are likely to reveal exactly what other people think of you. The predictions of other's thoughts are hard to tackle whereas predictions about their behaviors are easier to detect. Signs may not be objectively clear, which leaves too much room to give an anxiety-driven opinion, usually meaningless.
How do we give up safety behaviors? Think of a situation which you would like to be different. What are you willing to do differently? Aim to find out if the danger you perceive is real or imagined. Ask yourself, what is the threat? Identify it, expose it, and eradicate it for good. Build your confidence in your ability to adapt to the situations that arise and respond to them in a way that feels right for you!
The art of persuasion has its emotional appeal with a touch of rhetoric. Envy, the sense of discontentment with regard to another's advantages, successes, and possessions; the desire for an advantage possessed by another has an element of the male regard to the female's advantages portrayed in a negative light (the male who envies the female). For example, a male mimics a female's "good" behaviour or qualities to deceive its prey. Mimicry is the similarity of one species to another that protects one or both. They often evolve to share perceived characteristics with another's group and their "models" are obtained via the "selective process," whereas a signal-receiver, the "duped" has been deceived via flattery; is imitation the highest form of flattery?, lets find out!
The deceived signal-receiver is typically another organism. The mimic occurs in the same areas as their models-the success of others is not easily rationalized when they are perceived to be in the same rank. It is an insidious form of identity theft, one whom is identifying with its prey (the victim). In mimesis, the mimic takes on the properties of a specific object or organism, but the one to which is "duped" is indifferent. Mimicry is closely related to camouflage whereas the species resembles its surroundings and want to be/usually are difficult to detect.
The Opportunists: opportunism is the conscious practice of taking selfish advantage of circumstances with little/no regard for principles or consequences that will result. The actions are expedient and guided primarily by self-interested motives. Game Theory provides that the study of mathematical models of conflict and cooperation are between intelligent, rational decision making; i.e., calculating one move to the next.
The individual who holds envy in his heart is conceited and understands nothing. He/She has a morbid interest in controversial issues, questions and disputes certain matters of which he/she has no basic or complex understanding and is ephemera at best. He/She often subjects themselves to the "shiny ball syndrome" where one gets stuck into the uncertainty phase-the breeding ground of envy. The power of intention allows people to be who they are, when someone shows you who they really are, believe them--take note, their "green eyes" are watching you!