Emotional Intelligence v. Emotional Schemas
The way a conflict/discussion begins determines how it is going to end. Two people can fight often and still maintains a healthy relationship while other's can't.
It is not about how many bouts, but your technique and approach. Starting a conversation gently is the key to it ending well, but not always--remind yourself when to stop and recognize your limits.
Stress hormones inhibit higher cognitive functions like impulse control and attention. When we feel threatened, it's fight or flight; always get in your "me" time to cool down.
(Real Simple/January 2013)